Feb 01 2010
Step Two
“Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.”
Welcome to the “Using Al-Anon’s Steps in Our Personal Lives” blog. Many people are aware of the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and understand how they apply to the alcoholic’s goal of finding sobriety, but few are aware that Al-Anon Family Groups adapted these Steps in 1951 as a program of personal progress and family recovery.
This series of podcasts discusses how Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps have helped people successfully handle a variety of challenges associated with the family illness of alcoholism.
The topic of today’s podcast is Step Two.
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59 comments
Before I came to Al Anon, I believed my problems were too insignificant for God to notice. I was also raised to believe, “God helps those who help themselves,” and that God gave me gifts which I squandered. I struggled with hopelessness and resentment and martyrdom for many years. Once I came to Al Anon, I saw these sturggles as spiritual struggles. Al Anon is a spiritual program. Gradually I re-discovered a Higher Power who truly loves me. I keep expanding my concept of a Higher Power, but the central core of pure love remains. I know now that I am loveable in my Higher Power’e eyes. My Higher Power loves me too much to leave me the way that I am, so lessons present themselves to me. I can always use my program to become a more loving person to me, and to those around me. Sometimes lessons are about loneliess, hopelessness and resentment. But I recognize these as spiritual problems, and now I have hope, spiritual solutions, and a Higher Power to lead me through growing pains. I need to keep my relationship with my Higher Power my first priority. When I do, every intimate and personal relationship just gets better.
This step for me was a little harder to understand. I never looked up to Higher Power till lately. My actions had come to be insane (doing things over and over expecting different outcomes). Reading all these stories helped me realize to let go of the small things and that someone was looking out for me. We have challenges but that’s what makes us who we are today. Everything happens for a reason and my HP has shown me that. Thatnk you!
New to Fountain Hills as a result of a move due to husband in recovery. I have been to many AA meetings with him and find peace and serenity in joining him and listening to others. Would love to attend Al-Anon in the Fountain Hills Community and am looking for a schedule of them as to where and when. I have been to many previous to our move a couple of months ago and found a warm and peaceful atmosphere quite comforting during a tiime my spouse was in treatment. My spiritual strength and faith is what I have to rely on more throughout my day, than I have been. I know this is so true and would welcome any person who may be able to email me the Al-Anon schedule of meeting in FH. I look forward to meeting new faces who also are the friend or family of a person with addictions, as I am.
Thank you!
For me God had always been mainly in my church, but had the fortune to develop a ritual to talk to him and believe in him. Now, as an older person, think that the outcomes of my life do not fully belong to me; somehow my efforts, when they are ex-post going to be good for me, are rewarded in the way I intended originally; but most of the time God does not lead me where I was heading originally; many times my efforts have left me in situations of frustration; God has wanted me to learn from what I did wrong in the firs place; either the goals were not good for me, or the means to achieve them were not the right ones, so for me God is the enlightment that needst to arise into my head and soul and heart in order to act in the right direction and the proper tools. God is the consequence in nature and in the order of things.
Step Two
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
At first glance this step, for me, seemed both easy and obvious. Yes, I believe in God and No, I am not insane. I would have stated this the first time I crossed the threshold of Al-Anon had I been interviewed. Looking back now the truth wasn’t so easy and obvious. If insanity is trying to control the behavior of others and failing, then I was insane. I now realize that “insanity” means more than being bound in a strait-jacket sitting in a padded cell. If having a belief in God but leaving no space within which He could touch my life was a form of faith, then I was an A1 disciple. Prior to Al-Anon I honestly felt that God had more important things to do. As a faithful servant I would take care of my life leaving God more time to help others in far more need. What pride! I was taught that if at first you don’t succeed then try, try again. Giving up was not an option. If I was failing in any aspect in my life then I just needed to put in more effort. Increase the volume. On top of this, in the wake of wars, famines, tsunami’s, terrorism, recession, why on earth would God find time for me?
Through the program I am now beginning to understand that sanity involves accepting that my Higher Power can and wants to work in MY life. That the turning over of my life to a power greater than myself is crucial in restoring me to sanity. So much of this process involves restraint, stepping back, and allowing the God of my understanding to gently lead me back into my box. God paints a masterpiece in my life when I step back and I just need to remember what my painting ended up looking like…..(not something that would be hung in the Guggenheim, for sure)! What I find really disarming is when I do exercise wise restraint and step back the sheer speed at which my Higher Power moves in to my life. I find that experience scary (in a good way) but it also feels very alien, very new, very unfamiliar. It is a way of life that I have never experienced before and while it has only brought goodness, gentleness, joy and peace it still feels a bit like wearing new shoes…painful but good
I lost my car keys, and I knew I had gotten home with my car, so I didn’t worry. They would turn up. I borrowed my husband’s key to my car. But then, on the day of my Al-Anon meeting, I lost his key. I needed to set up for the meeting, so I asked to borrow his car. He refused. We got into an argument, and he said he wasn’t going to give me the only vehicle key left. I felt he was treating my like a child, but I began looking for keys and after about 10 minutes, I found one. On the way to the meeting, I was overcome with a familiar fear. For years, my husband would have rage attacks at what I considered to be insignificant provocations. I feared another of those attacks. He had not had a rage attack in his 17 years of sobriety. I recognized that I was experiencing PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder). When no one was prepared to lead my Al-Anon meeting, I asked to talk about fear. Listening to the experience of others was so helpful. As I sat there, I knew I needed to figure out my part in it, and I did. By the time I got home, I could go to my husband, sincerely apologize for procrastinating in finding the keys, and promise to conduct a thorough search the next morning. He smiled and said, “Great.” The next morning I found the keys. I thank my Al-Anon group members for saving me from my craziness. I am reminded of what a friend always tells me, “Never accept an invitation to go crazy.”
I have attended a couple of meetings very sparatically. It was until recently that a friend really encouraged me to start working with a sponsor. I have been meeting with an amazing sponsor for two weeks now, YAY God! I am on Step 2 now. Yay step 2. (LOL, all the yays). I really liked the part in the first podcast where a lady shared that she saw her higher power as the spirit of the group, something friendly and loving and or her grandmother. I always like when my higher power is presented to me in out of the box examples to expand my mind on how my higher power can restore me to sanity. I also liked the part where the last person shared about how if I don’t worry, it doesn’t mean that I don’t care. Yay Alanon! Thank you God for restoring us to sanity with your love and gentleness:)
This is a step I struggle with. In my life I have been a religious person when things got tough, and I figured it would be the same with this. But for some reason, I can’t find myself turning to my HP. I don’t know if it is because I’m ashamed I put myself in this situation when everyone told me not to, or if I still feel this is something I can control. This is a step that is going to take some time and effort for me, and I’m really hoping that once I can start attending some Al-Anon meetings and really working on myself it will come easier to me.
Came to believe….. this step came in small pieces for me first I came to meetings, many many many meetings I came and listened and shared and learned to trust the members of the groups then one day, at a meeting probably, I came to, I started to believe that my higher power was interested in me, and that my higher power was not my spouse, my sister, my group but was a God of my own understanding then I truly came to believe that my HP has my best interest in mind. He truly knows my path and can and will allow me to have a sane, serene peaceful life, if I allow him to be in charge. He allows me to be sane on a daily basis, as long as I allow him to show me his will for me. My life had so much insanity in it. And almost all of it was of my own making. Now, my life is calmer, if I remember to trust, ask, follow my HP and his plans.